For the Sake of Aaron: Celebrating Our Black Men |
"Men for All Seasons" by Charles Bibbs
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Grandmothers raising their children’s children
Grandmothers raising their grandchildren was once a phenomenon that occurred in extreme cases.
Today, an unprecedented number of Grandmother’s/Grandparents are bringing up their children’s children. Charged with the responsibility of mothering, fathering, loving, encouraging, disciplining and then again letting go, they command our compassion.
Our aging population is faced with this epidemic because of some of these factors: (1) An increasing number of females are being incarcerated at a higher rate than ever before; (2) more females are involved in the use, sell and abuse of drugs; (3) an increasing number of young adult parents have no commitment to the responsibility of parenting and lack effective life/parenting skills; and (4) increasingly female adult children are placing more emphasis on satisfying the needs of their male partners versus meeting the needs of their children.
It is imperative that mothers, today, become accountable for raising their children. In order to be accountable, young mothers must re-prioritize their value and judgment systems in the areas of parenting and responsibility.
Mothers must remember two important facts, as they seek change: (1) your parents are older and their quality of life will change as they continue to age.
Most will not be alive to completely raise your children, so at some point you will have the responsibility or the children will be awarded to the state; (2) your children are your responsibility, by law; and they should be your responsibility, by love!
Parents are charged to nurture, love, discipline and establish their children’s value systems.
You are responsible for their educational needs and ensuring a positive lifestyle for them. This must occur so your children can become self-assured, productive and contributing citizens.
That is your job, not the job of your parents or the responsibility of the children’s welfare system.
Grandparents are support systems who impart wisdom, additional love and the treats, trips and special moments that parents cannot impart. But parents are the examples for their children.
Statistics show that children gain their greatest image of who they are from their parents.
And the psychological damage to children who do not understand why their parents pass them on to their grandparents is beginning to show overwhelming negative results.
There are many classes available to help young parents learn what to do to ensure that their children gain the best parenting and the numerous supportive values that go with bringing up successful children. We salute the Grandparents and implore parents to take your responsibilities seriously. To your children, you seriously matter!
