A conversation about "that word"

by Mikel Kwaku Osei Holt
"Let me get this straight, brother, you’re not mad at Michael Richards for referring to the hecklers as niggers, you’re mad at Black people for being mad? That don’t make sense," the caller said in a frustrated tone.

"That’s not exactly what I said, but you’re close," I responded. "Let me clarify. I think that Black folks, who use the word as some kind of affectionate adjective, are hypocrites for getting mad at Richards for echoing a word they gave credence to. How can they say on one hand that the word is an affectionate term of endearment, and then get mad at White folks for echoing you?

"I, as a brother who has disdain for the word and don’t use or appreciate the word, can be mad at Richards, because I don’t use the word. I think it’s degrading, hateful, mean-spirited and self-defining.

"But y’all who do use it on a regular basis are hypocrites for getting mad at him," I explained somewhat mockingly. "It’s like getting mad at the outcome of an election, even though you didn’t vote."

"But that’s because you can’t accept our premise that people can control verbiage; that we took an offensive word, redefined it, and gave it another meaning," the brother responded. "We took the sting out of it.

"We own it; it’s a word that means one thing to us, and something totally different to White people. When they use the word, it’s meant to belittle, to denigrate. Do you understand what I’m saying?"

"Yeah, I guess I do," I retorted. "You’re saying that the n-word is synonymous with Blackness. And you’re also saying you took the teeth out of the tiger, declawed it. But if that’s true, why are you mad?

"From what I understand, Richards grew up in a Black neighborhood, where he heard his neighbors and friends using the word as you say, affectionately.

"Maybe he’s confused. My point is you can’t have it both ways. If you took the teeth out of the word, why is the bite hurting you now?

"But, let me take this a step further," I continued. "If the n-word is an affectionate word for Black people, does that mean you’re mother is one? Were King and Malcolm and Frederick Douglas, who fought against prejudice and promoted Black empowerment and self-esteem, niggers?

"Or, as I told a minister I heard using the word, is Jesus, the Christ, a nigger?

"Hey now," he interjected, "now that’s blasphemous..."

"Is it? The ‘Bible’ says Jesus was Black, a brother--skin like bronze, nappy hair. So, he was Black. Why not refer to him as a nigger?"

"See, you’re just trying to twist around what I said," the brother said. "Some people are niggers, and some people aren’t. Some older folks use the term to mean lower-class people, dumb people, or what you call ‘Neckbones.’ Most younger people use it like you would use the term dog, or my man, or brother.

"I’ve heard Black politicians using the term, and ministers. Civil rights leaders use it and teachers use it. It’s an acceptable word, but only among us. It’s like a White dude calling another White dude a redneck, or a Hispanic calling another Hispanic a spick.

"I wouldn’t use those terms, but an ethnic cultural thing, where they claim ownership and feel comfortable using it among themselves. They have redefined those words, and they are no longer painful."

‘Yeah, right. Just yesterday I put your theory to action. I was talking with our young staff reporter, Kia Marie Cook, and she essentially said the same thing you’re saying. A few minutes later, I put her to the test.

"She was writing a story. Her screen saver is a picture of her child. So I walked up to her and said, ‘that’s a pretty little nigger.’ Fortunately, I was standing a few feet away from her, because her initial reaction was to pimp slap me.

"I then explained why I made the comment, and she looked embarrassed. I can guarantee she’ll think twice about her theory.

"But let me touch on your other point. I never heard a South African call another African a kaffir..."

"A what?"

"That’s what White South Africans call Black South Africans. It’s a derogatory term akin to the n-word.

"I’ve never heard an Asian call another Asian slant eye, or a Native American call another Indian a ‘red nigger.’ That’s because they have more self-esteem than we do. They understand that you become what you refer to yourself as. You can mix water in with dirt all you want, but you’ll still end up with mud.

"Look, nigger is defined in the dictionary as an offensive term. Bigots conceived it, and its usage among Whites is as painful today as it was in 1619 when we were brought here in chains. Slavery exists all over the world, even to this day.

"But what made the American institution so unique is that it was interwoven with racism in which they justified their inhumane treatment by claiming we were subhuman; we were dumb animals, i.e. niggers.

"And as part of their system of controlling us, they ingrained in many of us a belief that we were in fact subhuman. Read the "Lynch" papers, or just look out your window.

"Far too many Black folks even today have a slave mentality. They continue to fall prey to a socialization process that breeds self-hatred and low self-esteem.

"So, what you are saying is, Black people should stop using the word? But that means they win and we lose. We empowered ourselves by influencing the meaning and use of the word. Now to retreat means they again control it."

"You can look at it that way, or you can say, as this sister in Beloit is saying, that we will bury this word as some illogical term of endearment and reject those, White or Black, who use it. White folks who use it are telling us how they feel about us. They expose themselves as racists, White supremacists. We eliminate the confusion and the hypocrisy.

"Face it; your well-meaning campaign didn’t work if you’re mad at Richards. The n-word still hurts, they have the penultimate power over that particular word."

"So what can we replace it with?" he asked.

"Look, I raised my children never to use the word; don’t define yourself by such a derogatory term. You’re the descendents of kings and queens, you’re God’s chosen, created in His image. Do you think God considers himself a nigger?

"As for another word, try brother and sister. Who knows, if we use those adjectives enough, maybe we’ll start treating each other as members of a larger family."

Hotep.